July 2011

07.30.2011

Now you mutter and you stutter and you putter, don't stop

As a well-established fan of both The Beastie Boys and Spike Jonze, it would seem negligent of me to not post their latest collaborative effort, the long-form music video/ short film / incredibly self-indulgent action figure romp for “Don’t Play No Game That I Can’t Win” off their new full length, Hot Sauce Committee Part 2.

An 11 minute video for a 4 minute song that can barely be heard most of the time? Sounds like the current state of the music industry to me.

It doesn’t quite hit the peak that the video for “Sabatoge” did, but I don’t think anybody, including Spike Jonze, was expecting that. And really, “Don’t Play No Game That I Can’t Win” kind of barely qualifies as a music video at all, but it sure is entertaining anyway. Would it be less entertaining if I wasn’t currently stoned and hadn’t spent countless hours as a child watching Thunderbirds? Probably. But I don’t want to get all caught up with technicalities. Ultimately, it comes down to this: the video has both the Dead Snow Nazi zombies and a Yeti. So, really, let’s not get greedy here.

07.29.2011

Whatchu gonna do with all that ass?

Is this Big Mac and are these his sesame seed buns they was talking about? Also, I wonder if those are regulation boxer briefs.

mcdonalds no pants Whatchu gonna do with all that ass?

No pants, yet, doo rag in effect. At least he’s got one part of the sanitation guidelines on lock. My recommendation? Say no to the special sauce.

07.29.2011

Popularity Contest

Today’s update is likely to make property owners and the local vandal squad a bit, heh, crabby. Yesterday, my new run of stickers arrived via a strange FedEx truck disguised as a Budget Rental truck. Unusual protocol, I know, but I assume it was to protect the extremely precious cargo from all the spies and ne’er-do-wells who would see to my downfall if they had their way.

sticker giveaway Popularity Contest

pile of stickers Popularity Contest

And speaking of shockingly generous offers, I’ve decided I haven’t been advertising my social media redundancy very well, which is no way to act in the 21st century, when we humans are merely receptacles for glowing screens and the content projected thereupon. So I’ve taken it upon myself to construct two amazing offers!!! I’m hoping those extra exclamation points come across as persuasive, I haven’t really experimented much in the realm of unnecessary punctuation.

Let’s start small. The 200th person to like Dedleg on Facebook gets a free set of buttons and some of our new stickers to boot. The 200th person to like Dedleg in real life, well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I’m still working on my immediate family.

social media giveaway Popularity Contest

be Dedleg's 200th like on Facebook and get free buttons and stickers Be Dedleg's 200th follower on Twitter and get free buttons and stickers

Additionally, the 30th person to follow us on Twitter gets the same delightful prize package. Due largely to my total lack of anything resembling a “real life,” I’m actually fairly active on Twitter, so the real reward is, of course, bearing witness to my brilliant insights and darkest secrets (like how to easily create diarrhea by consuming a 6 pack of Brooklyn Lager and half a bag of Spicy Nacho Doritos at 2:30 am).

On that note, they really need to capture whatever it is about Doritos that keeps the taste in your mouth for an entire day after eating them and apply that science to breath mint technology. It’s certainly not doing anything for the predominant “radioactive cheese dust is radioactive” theory.

For the sake of clarification, I thought this diagram might help.

dorito question mark Popularity Contest

Anyway, my cheese scale is way of the charts, so let’s get on with it. Drones, man your social media battle stations! You don’t spend all day on the Internet for nothing. At the very least, you can always think of it as a nice break from downloading porn!

07.28.2011

The Sticky, the Icky and the Sticky Icky Icky

Easy Ways To Tell You Smoke Too Much Marijuana #9: You find yourself googling “did hobbits really smoke weed?” out of genuine curiosity.

In high school, my friends and I used to skate a bank in the back of a grocery store, often after participating in less legal teenage fun. To get to the bank, we’d have to walk through a sort of alley-way, where it was clear other young miscreants liked to spend their off-hours. Almost as a welcoming committee, the side of the store sported all kinds of flaking graffiti, my favorite of which was an aging mural of a crudely-drawn, stereotypical alien smoking a huge joint. It was retarded, and I loved it. However, it was not the first drawing of an alien smoking weed, and it will not be the last — it is part of a rich tradition of depicting aliens enjoying marijuana, and so too is my latest drawing.

martian mean green sour diesel trainwreck The Sticky, the Icky and the Sticky Icky Icky

This drawing was inspired by a few particular strains of weed… particularly potent, as I’ve been told: Martian Mean Green, Trainwreck, and Sour Diesel. Get it? Before anyone asks, yes, I am aware this is one of the most absurd things I’ve ever drawn for this website… and that’s really saying something around here.

Anyway, no tribute to this whimsical and thought-provoking genre of art would be complete without a collection of compelling examples.

alien smoking weed The Sticky, the Icky and the Sticky Icky Icky

Maybe I’ve been watching too much Ancient Aliens lately, but this is probably true… just btw.

robot weed The Sticky, the Icky and the Sticky Icky Icky

Sentient, non-organic aliens are still aliens.

take me to your dealer The Sticky, the Icky and the Sticky Icky Icky

I truly believe this is the best the Internet can offer as far as images of aliens smoking joints go. And I’m not saying that’s a bad thing.

yoda smoking a joint The Sticky, the Icky and the Sticky Icky Icky

Hey, he’s an alien too.

schwarzenegger smoking joint The Sticky, the Icky and the Sticky Icky Icky

Okay, so he’s not an alien. In fact, he’s never even played an alien. But he’s no mere man, either. I still got mad love for you, Arnie.

07.27.2011

Fun ways to destroy your board, and other board-related news

Good afternoon ladies and germs, here’s the latest from Dedleg’s “Skateboardy Type Shit You’ve Probably Already Seen” Desk.

bart riding skateboard Fun ways to destroy your board, and other board related newsSanta Cruz just released a series of Santa Cruzers inspired by The Simpsons, including Bart’s signature neon green board. Kid’s been shredding for 22 years, about damn time somebody turned him pro.

In case you’re not one to shout “eat my shorts” while knocking old ladies down on the sidewalk, they also produced a board in the shape of a Duff’s beer can, a Simpsons flip of the iconic Santa Cruz Rob 1 graphic, and a truly strange one in the shape of Homer’s bust. They claim “Homer is the ultimate skate shape!” which is… probably not true, but it sure makes for one of the most borderline disturbing cruiser shapes I’ve ever seen. The donut wheels are a nice touch, though.

simpsons santa cruz cruisers Fun ways to destroy your board, and other board related news

Next up are the animated board graphics Natas Kaupas produced for the Public Domaine skateboard art show in Paris at Gaite Lyrique last month. Definitely one of those “how come nobody thought of that before?” ideas. While the concept may seem obvious in retrospect, the execution is certainly what makes this piece such a wonder to behold. It’s a beautifully animated little bit of nostalgia, and easily the current titleholder of the “Coolest Skate Art (Skart) of All Time” award.

And finally, a short clip from Slap as a farewell tribute to the brutal, unrelenting heat wave that thoroughly scorched NYC last week. With temperatures breaking records by the day, everybody was either looking for a way to cool down or succumbing to heat-induced mania. Seriously, shit was downright Do The Right Thing hot. Floridian ripper — and coincidental skate artist to boot — Alex Fogt found some innovative ways to make use of a spewing fire hydrant, further proof of skateboarders’ innate ability to find opportunity in the most unlikely of places.

And the short clip is further proof of how timeless simple skateboarding is. Here’s a video with no combos, no grinds, no stair sets, rails, drops or really any major risk of injury, and it’s still the most entertaining and memorable web clip I’ve seen recently. Everybody hates forgetting how to do tricks, but let’s not forget how to have fun either, shall we?

07.27.2011

Aw skee skee motherfucker, aw skee skee goddamn

Ah, the omnipresent 24-hour ATM. Too giving, and never judgmental. Many times have I sought your services. Many times, to my despair.

24 hour atm Aw skee skee motherfucker, aw skee skee goddamn

But not on this fortunate occasion, for I had discovered a locale actually worth spending my money at!

reflection of skeeball game in window Aw skee skee motherfucker, aw skee skee goddamn

A skee ball bar! …With… a cage full of beer! What more do you need?

skee ball bar Aw skee skee motherfucker, aw skee skee goddamn

Now, I am not known for my dexterity when it comes to balls… um, in any sense icon cool Aw skee skee motherfucker, aw skee skee goddamn

My hand-eye coordination is not on the level of, say, all the other kids in gym class who never wanted me on their teams. Skee ball is one of the few ball sports I can actually achieve some amount of success in, primarily because it is a solitary game, and therefore subject to my very relative definition of success. For this reason, pinball also appeals greatly to my nonexistent athletic talents, particularly because you never even need to make physical contact with the ball.

calvinball Aw skee skee motherfucker, aw skee skee goddamn

Nonetheless, my hand-eye coordination when it comes to photography is a little bit better. Caught the ball going into the 20 pocket. Unfortunately nobody was there to take a picture when I sunk it in the 100. But, it’s not really that big of a deal or anything…

cagey light fixture Aw skee skee motherfucker, aw skee skee goddamn

Despite all my rage I am still a bright light in a cage. Eh? Eh?

07.26.2011

Skateboarding is flipping out

Caught this insanity on Thrasher and it seems droves of viewers have already feasted their eyes upon one of the oddest and simultaneously most impressive skateboarding maneuvers ever caught on film. Now, I’m not sure what the exact numbers are, but in case there are more than 68,764 (and counting) skateboarders in the world, I figured I’d go ahead and post this.

Sorry, but I couldn’t help myself…

backflip 50 meet innovation parody Skateboarding is flipping out

Look familiar?

It’s hard keeping up with the speed of the Internet these days, but something tells me it’ll be a while before we see mainstream skateboarding catch up to this dude’s shit. At the very least, I hope that’s the case. The last thing Street League needs is widespread backflipping.

Personally, I think the most incredible part of the whole video is that he can do the trick so well going backwards, too icon wink Skateboarding is flipping out

07.26.2011

Apathy and Exhaustion

A surprise deadline this morning and a subsequent total lack of motivation forced my latest drawing to go up very late indeed, even by our usually tardy (or was that ‘tarded?) standards. Considering how indifferent I feel about updating the blog at all today, I’d say we’re actually doing pretty well. But hey, don’t thank me, thank the drawing. If it wasn’t for him, shit would be real boring around here.

trippy sad monster Apathy and Exhaustion

That’s all for now. I’ve got a tattoo appointment tonight and I already feel like I’ve been mercilessly flogged by a team of muscle-bound sadists after skateboarding for a few hours yesterday. At the moment, I’m just trying to avoid work, pain or anything else vaguely uncomfortable for as long as I can.

07.25.2011

Vomitorium

Maybe my expectations are just super low after being disappointed by my species for a quarter century, but as far as I’m concerned, this is the peak of human ingenuity.

Introducing, bored dude, one cup.

Many a well-intentioned environmentalist will decry this creation for its wastefulness, but it’s not like they drink the chemical-laden sugar swill the masses refer to as “soda” anyway, right? Just like, wheatgrass smoothies and spinach shakes, right? So like, who cares? Plus, if the soda all went towards the realization of this masterpiece, then I think one can hardly consider it a waste. So there.

07.25.2011

Wash it all away

After a week of blistering temperatures, the weather gods seem poised to bless us with some rain. Typically, I hate rain as it prevents me from partaking in my manchildish hobby of choice (skateboarding). But right now, I’m actually almost looking forward to it. It’d be nice if some of the wetness soaking the streets of Brooklyn wasn’t just the sweat pouring down my back for the first time in a while.

flowers in gutter Wash it all away

tree lit up at night parked motorcycle Wash it all away

tree lit up at night Wash it all away

Anyway, speaking of that manchildish hobby of mine… I think I’d better get to it before the rain does prevent me from partaking in it.

07.23.2011

If you can't take the planking, get out of the kitchen

Maybe I’m the only one, but I don’t really find the whole planking fad all that amusing. Bums have been lying down wherever the hell they want for decades, and nobody paid them any mind. Hell, hardly anybody even paid them any loose change. Nonetheless, typical of our deformed, grotesque culture, people only got on board once annoying white college kids started posting pictures of themselves planking on the Internet.

Anyway, I don’t want to sound like too much of a Scrooge. Maybe it really is a whole lot of fun. God knows, I enjoy lying down and taking a nap from time to time, so I can understand the appeal. But I didn’t really see what was so funny about it until the trend hit its peak and we were finally gifted with its second wave — the inevitable planking mishaps.

Sure, it’s all fun and games, until someone almost gets crushed by an extremely heavy name-brand appliance.

In this reviewers opinion, the cameraman/presumed love interest’s cry, “Oh-HO! SHIT! REBECCA!” at :08 seconds injects some much needed humanity into the planking phenomenon. Indeed, it is not all fun and games — planking is a serious affair, wrought with peril, that can either bring young couples together… or tear them apart.

Be careful, would-be-plankers. This overzealous newcomer’s goose almost got cooked! icon wink If you cant take the planking, get out of the kitchen