dedleg.com

Tentative title of Dedleg’s debut dance album: Sprain Monster. There are going to be costumes and shit. Fashion and spectacle. Currently accepting offers for cellphone and sunglasses sponsors.

Got my leg “electro-massaged” today. Overall, not nearly as unpleasant as getting massaged by electricity may sound. Still, it’s kind of like getting a charlie horse over and over again for 10 minutes straight. Is it helping? No idea.

They also gave the back of my leg an ultrasound, so maybe my knee is actually pregnant, not sprained? A whole baby in there would sure explain why it hurts so goddamned much.

Either way, after all of this, the various contortions they’ve been submitting my legs to, and a resume packed with sprain experience, I’m pretty convinced that the easiest way to cure a sprain is by never setting foot on a skateboard. But where’s the fun in that? Besides, getting injuries are a good excuse to get stoned and play video games, and that’s awesome.