Posts Tagged "volcanos"


Apocalypse now

Since the Mayan Calendar is ending soon, it should stand to reason that we’d be having some pretty ridiculous weather across the globe. I mean, just take a look at the 2009 documentary starring John Cusack, 2012, that predicts the whole apocalyptic affair. I’m kidding, of course, but when you see some of the photos from the Puyehue volcano in Chile that erupted last week really help give some credence to that whole “fire and brimstone” preaching crowd.

All photos via National Geographic… you know, that magazine with all the shameless indigenous boobies.

chile volcano lightning1 Apocalypse now

Photograph by Francisco Negroni, Agenci Uno/European Pressphoto Agency

chile volcano plume Apocalypse now

Photograph by Ivan Alvarado, Reuters

MOUNT DOOM! Oh, Mister Frodo, what are we gonna do?

That plume is six miles high, for the record. No big deal. Maybe it is for a hobbit, but I’m a human and I don’t care.

chile volcano lightning2 Apocalypse now

Photograph by Ivan Alvarado, Reuters

Lightning expert, Martin Uman, at the University of Florida in Gainesville says a volcanic lightning storm isn’t “unlike a regular old thunderstorm,” which I guess is true, disregarding the fact that they’re ten times more horrifying than a “regular old thunderstorm.” Eight-year-olds have sleepovers and read R.L. Stein books by flashlight during “regular old thunderstorms,” Mart. Conversely, during a volcanic lightning storm, eight-year-olds are evacuated along with thousands of other residents of their small, Chilean community that is about to be bombarded by poisonous volcanic gases and metric tons of ash.

lightning smoke column chile volcano Apocalypse now

Photograph by Daniel Basualto, European Pressphoto Agency

More proof of my “ten times more horrifying” postulation.

chile volcano lightning3 Apocalypse now

Photograph by Ivan Alvarado, Reuters

Nature sure is capable of some pretty jaw-dropping shit. But I think I’ll stick to my sunsets for now. Maybe their lightshow isn’t quite as spectacular as a volcanic eruption, but that’s a fairly reasonable trade-off when you’re trying to, like, continue living.