Posts Tagged "Super Mario Bros."

12.10.2012

Bowl Cuts

There are probably a fairly limited number of you who are going to actually care about what I’m about to show you, but it’s my blog, and I’ll bore you all to tears if I want to. I was going to say “bore you all to death,” but I already beat one murder charge, and I’m not about to go through that hassle again. Such a nightmare.

In any case, if you know me, you know I’m not much for psychotropic drugs. Personally, the problem with smoking dope is not so much that it’s illegal, it’s that it’s just plain immoral. You know what my mother used to call marijuana? The Devil’s Pubic Hair. And if your pubic hair looked like that, you wouldn’t want to smoke it, so why are you going to smoke his? It made a lot of sense.

Nonetheless, there are some particularly creative potheads out there, despite their significant character flaws, and some of them are cooking up some pretty entertaining ways to get baked! Check out these incredible glass pipes by Hedcraft, dealers of custom smokeware and who knows what else.

piranha plant bowl Bowl Cuts

Just like the Piranha Plants from whence this piece was inspired, dabble with this guy too much and you’re going to be losing some major coin.

yoda bowl Bowl Cuts

The Force is strong with this one, but this Sour Diesel is much stronger, yes?

And that lightsaber poker is just fucking dope, no shamefully obvious drug-related pun intended.

cookie monster bowl Bowl Cuts

Look, I’m just going to say what we’re all thinking here. Hmm… cookies.

All of this fine paraphernalia can be acquired at Hedcraft’s etsy store, unsurprisingly, considering that’s where all the hippies go to sell their moonstone bracelets and hand-painted power crystals and whatnot.

03.30.2011

First-Person Plumbing

Regrettably, First-Person Super Mario Bros is not a release title for the new Nintendo 3DS. Indeed, gamers hoping to finally get a better sense of what it would actually be like to jump on a Goomba’s head will have to make due with this video put together by some seriously huge nerds that simulates a first-person Mario game. The 2D side-scrolling PiP is a nice touch, though more blood and boobs would have been nice.

I realize this is far from one of the cooler things I’ve posted on this site, but I can’t help myself when it comes to shit like this. Nerds are notoriously good at Dungeons & Dragons, and it was clear that I fell under some kind of dark mage’s spell years ago when I first played Wolfenstein 3D. I’ve been powerless against first-person shooters ever since. Personally, I still consider my early education in nazi-killing more valuable than any grade-school grammar lesson. Indeed, who needs spelling bees when you can already spell “killing spree” by the time you’re in Kindergarten?

07.19.2010

Streets is Watching

Super Mario Bros. is eternal — an icon woven into the fabric of pop culture, or perhaps etched into its sidewalk anyway. Though at times it almost becomes a cliche, particularly due to the YouTube nation, there are still some clever, and maniacally hard-working, people out there applying Super Mario in really fucking amazing ways.

Andreas Heikaus made this video for his bachelor thesis at the University of Applied Science and Art Hannover. He used some incredible… things… I don’t understand to cast a nearly flawless run through the game on a city sidewalk covered in graffiti scrawls. Without the bounds of a television screen, the levels stretch on down the curb, and basically it’s super fucking cool.

In Andreas’ words:

I stitched the entire level together that I got a huge panorama… after this I made the animation with the original sprites from the game for the whole thing in the areas you normally won’t see…

He’s German. Anyway, fuck all that nerdy shit anyway — he completed the game in six minutes, sick!